How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
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