If Curt Schilling could pitch a game with that blood-filled sock... if Tiger Woods won the 2008 US Open with a torn ligament, then I'd be an embarrassment to the human race if I couldn't manage to at least jerk him off even if I was still crying after he put it in my butt.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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