normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
I wish there were birth control emojis
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
MASS TEXT: Next weekend I will be in town for St. Patty's day. There will be a bonfire and liqour olympics. We will have booze but in order to participate it is byob. Upon arrival everyone will be asked to sign a waiver. I am not responsible for liver failure, death, loss of clothing or memory, bites, scratches, hickies, pregnancies, or any other for of injury you may obtain while participating. There will be ridiculous amounts of green glitter, be prepared to puke it up. ALSO WEAR SOMETHING GREEN OR YOU WILL BE PENALIZED!! AUTOMATIC 5 SHOTS. HAPPY GAMING!!!
Randomize
