She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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