Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
I queefed so loud it echoed.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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