Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
He stumbled in drunk at 7am, while we were getting ready for work. He poured a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, poured Jack Daniels on it., and said he was having "Captain Jack" for breakfast. I don't know how he's alive and employed. I hope the Cap'n calls in sick for him today.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Randomize
