Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
Randomize
