Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
that's an acceptable place to lick
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
Randomize