i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize
