Bisexual people are plain selfish.
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
Randomize
