I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
god damn woman. you are like the herpes of drunk texting. you never go away.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
Randomize
