it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
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