I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
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