In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
