So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
Randomize
