He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
soo... how was my night?
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
