Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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