Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize
