There was a lot of him and a little penis
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
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