I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
I supernannyed him into submission
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
Randomize
