it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
