found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize
