I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
of course. lets lasso hookers.
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Randomize
