i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
Randomize
