ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
Randomize
