Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
Randomize
