My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
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