Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
so when our kids ask "when did you know you loved mommy?" you're gonna say "when she sent me emoticons about slobbing on my knob?"
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
Randomize