We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
Randomize
