I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
Buhtt sex?
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
Randomize
