He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
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