is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I accidentally threw away from slim jim and some lady saw me dig it out of the garbage. It was unopened but still, I look so homeless.
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
Randomize
