you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
Maybe singing about how you'd bang Morgan Freeman to the tune of Single Ladies while holding champagne and a box of Cheerios wasn't the best first impression on his parents
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Randomize
