Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
