just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
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