Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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