if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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