nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
