So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
Randomize
