I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
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