At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Randomize
