hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
Randomize
