Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
Randomize
