No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
Randomize
