I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
