life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
Someone signed my nipple.
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