I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize