distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
Randomize
