May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
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