so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
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