im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
Randomize
