he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
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