So it's 11:24am. I've had sex twice and been laid 3 times. I love holidays!
I understand the whole sex thing but did you really get laid or is that synonymous for more alcohol?????
Honestly.
Don't say a word.
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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